{"id":2115,"date":"2015-04-08T09:30:26","date_gmt":"2015-04-08T13:30:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/?p=2115"},"modified":"2015-06-05T15:07:14","modified_gmt":"2015-06-05T19:07:14","slug":"dont-say-no-unless-youll-go","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/","title":{"rendered":"Don’t Say No Unless You’ll Go!"},"content":{"rendered":"

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"Don't<\/a><\/p>\n

I have been working on a two-part podcast episode about one year olds. So many child training (and child enjoying!) tricks and tips have come back to me recently as I have been enjoying being Nonna to our first grandchild, fourteen month old Jason Nathanael.<\/p>\n

Jason is a sweet, good-natured little guy. And our daughter and son-in-law have already done a great job laying a foundation for being able to really enjoy him during his toddler years. He goes to bed well, takes a predictable nap, sits in a high chair for meals, sits on their laps during church, etc. He is curious\u2014that\u2019s for sure! And that is what made me remember how important it is to not continually say \u201cNo, no, no, no!\u201d to a toddler.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

\"Jason\"<\/a><\/p>\n

I get to keep Jason one day a week while my daughter works on their disability ministry (One Heart). I don\u2019t get anything done! \ud83d\ude42\u00a0 And I am fine with that because he is, after all, one year old! And he is inquisitive, curious, and healthy. When I do sit down for a few minutes to try to write something quickly or answer an email, I find myself saying, \u201cNo, Jason. That\u2019s Nonna\u2019s. Don\u2019t touch it\u201d or \u201cNo, Jason. That\u2019s not a baby toy.\u201d And so on and so forth.<\/p>\n

Then, just like many mothers and fathers (and other Nonnas, I\u2019m sure) of toddlers, I decide how much I need for him to get out of whatever he is into! The computer keyboard or electrical cords\u2014I jump right up after I say no and pull him away from them. Speak firmly to him. And move him back to his toys.<\/p>\n

An empty rice box that my son needs to take out to the trash? I decide that isn\u2019t important enough to get up for\u2014and I let him keep it. Even though I just said, \u2018No, Jason. That\u2019s uncle\u2019s trash.\u201d<\/p>\n

And that is when I remembered my husband and my advice to each other not to say no unless<\/p>\n

(1) we really mean it (it is truly important), and<\/p>\n

(2) we are willing to follow up on that no.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Thus, \u201cDon\u2019t Say No Unless You\u2019ll Go!\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

One year olds hear a chorus of \u201cno\u2019s\u201d all day. If we only act on half of the no\u2019s we say, a no begins to lose its significance. A toddler can hear our no but continue right on with what he was getting into before\u2014unless we pull him away from the forbidden object and re-direct him. (Or, in some cases, tap his hand or behind\u2014especially in dangerous situations.)<\/p>\n

If each time we are about to say no to our toddler, we think about whether we really mean it and if we are actually willing to get up and get him out of something\u2014follow through on our no\u2014we will say no less frequently, and the toddler will actually learn to get out of things.<\/p>\n

If we want to start genuinely training a toddler to obey our commands, we can\u2019t say no unless we\u2019ll go.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

To learn more about toddler training, listen to Donna\u2019s latest podcast episodes on Wondering Wednesday: Q & A\u2014What to Do With a Wonderful One Year Old<\/a> and What to Do With a Wonderful One Year Old Part II<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    I have been working on a two-part podcast episode about one year olds. So many child training (and child enjoying!) tricks and tips have come back to me recently as I have been enjoying being Nonna to our first grandchild, fourteen month old Jason Nathanael. Jason is a sweet, good-natured little guy. And […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_mi_skip_tracking":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[643,308],"tags":[334,432,454],"yoast_head":"\nDon't Say No Unless You'll Go! - Character Ink<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Don't Say No Unless You'll Go! - Character Ink\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"    I have been working on a two-part podcast episode about one year olds. So many child training (and child enjoying!) tricks and tips have come back to me recently as I have been enjoying being Nonna to our first grandchild, fourteen month old Jason Nathanael. Jason is a sweet, good-natured little guy. And […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Character Ink\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/characterinkcompany\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/characterinkcompany?ref=bookmarks\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2015-04-08T13:30:26+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2015-06-05T19:07:14+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/farm8.staticflickr.com\/7596\/16930199425_9ac242b5e2_z.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Donna\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Donna\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/\",\"name\":\"Don't Say No Unless You'll Go! - Character Ink\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2015-04-08T13:30:26+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2015-06-05T19:07:14+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/#\/schema\/person\/801ef5fa0749f7c8c379e32c743fba64\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Don’t Say No Unless You’ll Go!\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/\",\"name\":\"Character Ink\",\"description\":\"Home of the Language Lady & Cottage Classes!\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/#\/schema\/person\/801ef5fa0749f7c8c379e32c743fba64\",\"name\":\"Donna\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/a34d703c1b470108b3e0674490546317?s=96&d=blank&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/a34d703c1b470108b3e0674490546317?s=96&d=blank&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Donna\"},\"sameAs\":[\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/characterinkcompany?ref=bookmarks\"],\"url\":\"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/author\/cqlalady\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Don't Say No Unless You'll Go! - Character Ink","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Don't Say No Unless You'll Go! - Character Ink","og_description":"    I have been working on a two-part podcast episode about one year olds. So many child training (and child enjoying!) tricks and tips have come back to me recently as I have been enjoying being Nonna to our first grandchild, fourteen month old Jason Nathanael. Jason is a sweet, good-natured little guy. And […]","og_url":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/","og_site_name":"Character Ink","article_publisher":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/characterinkcompany\/","article_author":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/characterinkcompany?ref=bookmarks","article_published_time":"2015-04-08T13:30:26+00:00","article_modified_time":"2015-06-05T19:07:14+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"https:\/\/farm8.staticflickr.com\/7596\/16930199425_9ac242b5e2_z.jpg"}],"author":"Donna","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Donna","Est. reading time":"3 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/","url":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/","name":"Don't Say No Unless You'll Go! - Character Ink","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/#website"},"datePublished":"2015-04-08T13:30:26+00:00","dateModified":"2015-06-05T19:07:14+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/#\/schema\/person\/801ef5fa0749f7c8c379e32c743fba64"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/dont-say-no-unless-youll-go\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Don’t Say No Unless You’ll Go!"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/","name":"Character Ink","description":"Home of the Language Lady & Cottage Classes!","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/#\/schema\/person\/801ef5fa0749f7c8c379e32c743fba64","name":"Donna","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/a34d703c1b470108b3e0674490546317?s=96&d=blank&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/a34d703c1b470108b3e0674490546317?s=96&d=blank&r=g","caption":"Donna"},"sameAs":["https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/characterinkcompany?ref=bookmarks"],"url":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/author\/cqlalady\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2115"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2115"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2115\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2221,"href":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2115\/revisions\/2221"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2115"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2115"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/characterinkblog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2115"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}