With the closeness of two of our parenting seminars in Indiana and the extremely high interest in training toddlers and preschoolers in character and obedience, I decided to re-run parts of two past posts today. Scroll all the way to the bottom for some other links, as well! And share our blog and FaceBook page with others who might be interested in learning about how to enjoy those years more than ever–from a Christian couple who LOVED ages two to six! Smile…


Question: How can I start some of the character training concepts and habits that you describe with a toddler?


Answer: If you are just starting out with your family and have only a toddler, you have the perfect opportunity to start out right in the character training of your children! I will offer some general tips below, but even more importantly than the “daily ins and outs” of the ideas I recommend, I suggest that you read Parenting Paradigms at this blog (soon to become “Character Training From the Heart”). Even if you take to heart some of the ideas for your little one given in this Q and A, in the end, you will be more successful at character training if you have a firm handle on what you believe about parenting and children.



                                        Toddler Character Training Tips



1. Start adapting the toddler to your schedule and your family’s lifestyle as soon as you can (six to nine months) rather than making your family’s life revolve around the little one’s “wants.” You want to enjoy your toddler within the dynamics that your family already has (with the addition of the joy and wonder that a toddler brings into the family, of course)—as opposed to making everything change to meet unnecessary and often chaotic demands that a toddler who is given his own way all the time can often make.(Check out our important material on discerning wants vs. needs. ALWAYS meet needs–in a timely, loving, and consistent way!)



2. Remember that you are setting the stage right now for your child’s “tastes” (follow us on PP 365 or schedule our seminar for more details about this important concept).

a. You can set his tastes for defiance (allowing screaming, throwing, thrashing, and “no” from him) or submission.

b. You can set his tastes for selfishness and meanness (allowing hitting or other forms of striking, giving in to him when he wants something that someone else has, always making his surroundings whatever he wants (i.e. no bedtime, no sitting in high chair, etc.) due to “fits” or for kindness, gentleness, sweetness, and tenderness.

c. You can set his tastes for hyper-stimulation and activity (too much running; no scheduled down times; television and videos all the time) or for simple things (books, healthy toys, rest, etc.).

d. You can set his tastes to lack focus and not enjoy learning (again, too much video, not starting out with books and simple music; an avalanche of cartoons and children’s programming (some of which are developed in two second bits to keep up with short attention spans, thus, causing kids’ attention spans not to lengthen as they should) or a love for learning (via books, strong family learning, and discussion times, etc.).



3. Decide ahead of time what your “behavior absolutes” are.

a. These are the behaviors or character that you absolutely will not allow in your home. What you allow now will become the “acceptable behaviors” to your child. These seemingly innocent actions include “fibbing,” hitting, running the other way when called, etc.

b. For us, these “behavior absolutes” included talking back (no toddler saying “no” without being punished); lying or deceit; temper tantrums; and striking (hitting, pulling hair, throwing things at someone, etc.). Obviously, we wanted our kids to learn to obey and submit to us and to learn the many character qualities that are crucial to living a Christian life, but these four things were things we never wavered on—and things that we made huge deals out of when they were not adhered to by the toddler/preschooler.

4. Start showing your little one the joy of doing what is right. Contentment in your own life, the blessing of work, the joy of loving God and His people—and all of the character that you want your little one to adopt in his life—love, longsuffering, diligence, responsibility, and more will more likely be realized in our kids’ lives when we ourselves embrace and model them.

5. Try to establish routines that will aid in his character development—bedtimes, rising times, little “chores” (putting his books in his book basket after you read), nap times, meal times, story time, etc.



For more tips on toddlers and babies, click on the links provided below:



Who makes the decisions for the children—starts here and goes for a few days: https://positiveparenting3-6-5.blogspot.com/2010/10/day-260-who-makes-decisions-for.html




Say what you mean—starts here and goes for two days: https://positiveparenting3-6-5.blogspot.com/2010/09/day-248-dont-leave-your-little-one-at.html






Storytime: https://positiveparenting3-6-5.blogspot.com/2010/07/day-204-story-time.html

The post Character Training for Toddlers and Preschoolers–Boundaries, Simple Tastes, and More (partial reprint) appeared first on Character Ink.

We really are going to move out of the “when you rise up” stage of “teaching them diligently”–honest! However, we have found that if you get the first hour or two of your day down the way you want it, you will have a much more successful day later on. Also, success in the morning motivates us to more success later in the day–success breeds success!

So, we have gone over and over the “faith in the mornings”–private devotions, listening in the mornings, family devotions and read alouds, and more.

The other area that we like to tackle following faith in the morning is character training via chores and responsibilities. We did an entire month of chores, morning routines, chore charts, and chore schedules last year, so I encourage you to go to the blogspot, look in the index under chores, and have at it.

For today, I am going to post the link for the “age appropriate chores.” Summer is the perfect time to establish new chore schedules, morning routines, and more!

Chore Resources: https://positiveparenting3-6-5.blogspot.com/2010/04/day-113-114-resources-for-chores.html

Age Appropriate Chores (starting here with littles for several days): https://positiveparenting3-6-5.blogspot.com/2010/04/day-115-age-appropriate-chores-for.html

The post When You Rise Up: Age Appropriate Chores–Character Building in the Mornings appeared first on Character Ink.

https://positiveparenting3-6-5.blogspot.com/2010/07/day-186-links-for-charts-for-reading.html

The post Re-run: Old Post With Links for Charts for Reading, Chores, Morning Routines, etc. appeared first on Character Ink.

It is called Phrase Up–and I give it a hearty thumbs up! This amazing “search engine” allows you to type part of a phrase (colloquialisms, analogies, metaphors, or just common phrases) and put an * in the parts that you are missing. Then voila! It brings up a list of possible phrases that you  might be looking for. (Watch out! It’s addicting for wordsmiths!)

Again, this may be a great help to get just the right phrase or tone in a cover letter or thank-you note. To get the perfect metaphor for a story. And so much more. I think you’ll like it!

https://www.phraseup.com/

The post day 111: “catch phrase” appeared first on Character Ink.

If you are interested in learning more about writing poetry or improving the poetry you do write, you might want to obtain the poetry handbook described below. I like trying different kinds than I normally write (which are nearly alwyas rhymed verse of fairly “normal” rhyme schemes–ABAB, AABBCC, ABCB, etc.). A handbook such as this one helps me learn about other styles–and challenges me to give them a try!

There are many handbooks out there–but the one below received rave reviews, is not too long, and is written by an award-winning poet.

Amazon.com Review: This slender guide by Mary Oliver deserves a place on the shelves of any budding poet. In clear, accessible prose, Oliver (winner of both the Pulitzer Prize and the National Book Award for poetry) arms the reader with an understanding of the technical aspects of poetry writing. Her lessons on sound, line (length, meter, breaks), poetic forms (and lack thereof), tone, imagery, and revision are illustrated by a handful of wonderful poems (too bad Oliver was so modest as to not include her own). What could have been a dry account is infused throughout with Oliver’s passion for her subject, which she describes as “a kind of possible love affair between something like the heart (that courageous but also shy factory of emotion) and the learned skills of the conscious mind.” One comes away from this volume feeling both empowered and daunted. Writing poetry is good, hard work.

https://www.amazon.com/Poetry-Handbook-Mary-Oliver/dp/0156724006

Tomorrow–tips on getting started writing or teaching poetry.

The post day 97: poetry handbook appeared first on Character Ink.

According to the National Poetry Month site, the goals of National Poetry Month are to

According to the aforementioned site, the Academy celebrates National Poetry Month in the following ways:

Tomorrow—suggestions from the National Poetry Month for ways that individuals and teachers to celebrate this month.

In the meantime, I thought we could celebrate it here on Language Lady 365 by doing the following:

(1) Publishing poetry of the readers—you! I would love to publish some poems written by readers, so send them via INBOX, and I will put them up in the coming days;

(2) Have a poetry challenge—challenging readers to write a four line (or so) poem with words from a given word list. More on the latter later; in the meantime, send your poems in!

The post day 83: national poetry month part i of ii appeared first on Character Ink.

Some of the features we like:

1. Type in any word–it finishes them for you (for those who say, “I can’t use a dictionary if I don’t know how to spell the word to begin with”!)
2. Type in any word and get the definition
3. Type in any word and click “thesaurus” to get synonyms and even some antonyms
4. Click on the speaker and listen to someone say the word–we do this every week before we give spelling tests to ensure that we are pronouncing harder words correctly for our students
5. Links at the bottom of the dictionary page for each word with more sites, etymologies, and much more!

Trust me…you will love Merriam Webster Online!

https://www.merriam-webster.com/

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