“A penny for your thoughts; a nickel for a hug; and a dime if you tell me that you love me.”

We have talked at length on this blog about communicating with our kids. And how communication is a strong form of “teaching when…”

The ditty above is a little chant that we used to say to our kids to remind them that we want to talk to them, that they are valuable to us, that we love them “ten million times infinity and beyond.” From this saying, a valuable “object lesson” developed and tied my son’s and my heartstrings in a special way nearly twenty years ago.

The rest of that jingle (after the infamous “penny for your thoughts”) goes on to offer not only a penny for what the person is thinking, but also a nickel for a hug and ten cents if he or she says “I love you.”

Sixteen cents… a meager amount of change that elicits warm feelings (and, I admit, a few tears of longing) as I write this. Our oldest son and I used to take the “penny for your thoughts” a little further when he was a little boy—and repeat the rest of the jingle to each other, complete with a big hug and special “I love you.”

As Joshua grew up, we would occasionally remind each other of how much we love to talk—and how much we care for each other by giving each other sixteen cents. When he was in high school and worked part time, I would wake up in the morning to find him off to work—with a penny, a nickel, and a dime lying on my desk. When he would open his lunch box, he would sometimes find sixteen cents taped to the inside of his pail. Not enough money to buy lunch, for sure, but enough money to know that Mom will be waiting on him ready to talk when he gets home from work.

What objects might have special meaning to you and your child? Is there a special item that you can attach unique meaning to for one or more of your children? Is there a trinket, heart, words to a song, picture of the two of you, favorite picture book, etc. that can be utilized as an object “just for the two of you”? Another way to build a special talk time?

Related Links:

52 Ways to Say Triff Affirmation Cards for Families
Keep Kids Close
[Video] 52 Ways to Say Triff
52 Weeks: Who’s Got Their Shoes On?
52 Weeks: Malachi Time
52 Weeks: Story Time

The post 52 Weeks of Talking to Our Kids: A Penny for Your Thoughts, a Nickle for a Hug, and a Dime if You Tell Me That You Love Me appeared first on Character Ink.

Not long ago my twenty-one year old son was helping me clean and cut fruits and veggies. This is a rare sight nowadays. The boys are either in college all the time or working very full time jobs (well, actually, they both do both at the same time!). I miss those times of cooking and cleaning in the kitchen with my kids.

However, I didn’t expect the boys to miss it! Josiah, the twenty-one year old pediatric nurse I just referred to, said, “You know what I miss? I miss those times that we used to gather around the table with tons of potatoes, carrots, apples, and other fruits and vegetables and peel, cut, clean, and prep them while you read aloud to us for hours!”

So do I, baby, so do I!

In addition to reading aloud while they did produce prep, I loved to cook with the kids and just talk. It didn’t matter whether there were a few of them and we listened to radio dramas or talking books, laughed, and carried on or if there was just one and we quietly went about doing our tasks just talking, talking, talking—rarely a lull in the conversation.

So today I bring you a few tips to get your kids in the kitchen AND talking:

• Start young! Just like talking is more likely to happen with your teens if you started out talking when they were little, so it is with working together in the kitchen.
• Provide lots of opportunities for kitchen work together to happen. In our busy world, just hoping that times will appear for us to work and talk together doesn’t seem like a very good way to be sure they happen. With our kids, we had many opportunities in place for us to work together in the kitchen—chores each day, assistant chef to Mom (helping Mom with the evening meal), freezer cooking day, produce prep, etc.
• If you have kids who do not love cooking, make the sessions short and sweet.
• Just let the conversation go where ever it seems to go. One great thing about talking in the kitchen is that their hands are busy, but their minds are often not. Many great, heart-knitting conversations have happened in my kitchen over the past thirty years with my kids!
• If you are just starting the “cook and talk” approach, you might want to use talking books or radio dramas. This will often lead to stopping it to talk about it—another amazing teaching opportunity!

So go ahead…invite your child in to the kitchen to “slice, dice, and julienne”—and enjoy more talk time with your awesome kids!

Related Links:

[Podcast] Simplified Meal Planning

[Podcast] How Can I Be More Efficient in the Kitchen?

[Podcast] How to Implement Cycle Cooking for Freezer Entrees and Starters

[Podcast] 10 Questions to Ask Yourself Before You Start Freezer Cooking

The post 52 Weeks of Talking to Our Kids: Kitchen Talks appeared first on Character Ink.